So I'm wandering down the corridor painting relief contour tiles with my iPhone and bump in to Larry and Sergey. They're arguing over some stupid math problem again, something about optimal network utility functions and I'm like guys you need to get out more. Larry's totally offended but Sergey says "You should check out our phone company" and I'm like "Woah".
We're buying all this spectrum so we can totally like nail Nokia or something with my Android OS. But I was like "Guys, give me this budget and we could have totally nailed TeleAtlas or NavTeq" but then I ran the numbers and the spectrum is like half the cost of buying one of the paleo-tard companies. I mean these guys drive around bright yellow vans all day - is that the business we want to be in??
No, of course not. Thats so like, web -1.0. Or something. So 1997. But we're tied to these guys, we have like a 10 year deal to show these maps and every time you view a map tile we have to give these guys a free adwords click or something.
But then Sergey is all like "You don't see it do you?" and I'm like "no" and he's like "We're gonna bury Nokia with the whole spectrum/Android thing, and then we're gonna buy them and we get NavTeq for free". That just totally blew me, it's so cross-paradigm we get two companies for the price of one!!
Written and submitted from the Google 757 at 30,000ft using my satellite uplink.